Five Strategies to Find Work/Family Balance

Work and family are often opposing forces, competing for your limited time, attention and energy.  You need to focus on your work, but problems at home can make that a challenge.   Further, your work often invades your home life, especially as technology has made it easy to check messages or speak to a co-worker at anytime.  As a work deadline looms, you may find yourself working at home instead of spending the time you want with your children.

The good news is that you can take steps to reduce the conflict between work and family and find more balance in your life.  If you have less conflict between your work and family, you will have the opportunity to be a better parent and a better employee.  Depending on the nature of your current situation, one or more of the following tips should start you on your way:

1.  Ask for more flexibility at work.

Cutting back your hours, a schedule change such as a compressed workweek, or an opportunity to work-from-home may give you more time to meet the needs of your family.  Don’t wait for your company to put flexible work options in place.  Figure out how your proposed arrangement would benefit your company and write a well-thought out proposal to request it.

2.  Get a new job (or a new career).

If you don’t love your job, it is time to make a change.  An important aspect of family friendly work is that it is successfully integrated in your life.  If you hate your job, you will likely resent it for taking you away from your kids.  Plus, your kids will sense your dislike, adding stress to your family.  You may need to look for a more family friendly company where you can continue your career.  Or, you may want to consider further education or training to help you change careers. 

3.  Make sure you have the right supports in place.

If you are a working parent, you can’t do everything on your own. If your kids are young, you need reliable childcare, as well as back-up childcare.  If your kids are in school, you might need after-school care or help transporting them around.  If you aren’t happy with your childcare arrangement, it is worth the time and effort to do research and find a new arrangement.  If you don’t have friends or family nearby to help out, you should try to make new friends.  Look for a local parenting organization, or go online to network with others in your area. You can easily meet other parents by checking out websites such as www.meetup.com, www.craigslist.com or www.matchingmoms.com.

4. Scale back on housework. 

Your kids won’t remember the dust bunnies in the corner when they grow up.  They will remember that you had time to play a game with them before they went to bed each night.  You will have plenty of time after your kids head off to college to clean up your house.  Seriously consider what you can eliminate, or outsource around your home.    

5.  Re-evaluate your involvement in outside activities.

How many organizations do you belong to?  How many activities are your kids involved in? Do you find yourself running from stop to stop after work, picking up a kid here, dropping another there?  Missing another dinner with your family because you have to attend a meeting? Take some time to re-evaluate outside activities, for both you and your kids.  Only participate in those that are essential for your career or personal success.  You should also considering limiting the number of activities that your kids are involved in.  As you make such decisions, try to find activities that allow parental involvement.

Working to build a more family friendly work arrangement can help you meet your family’s needs.  Further, when it comes to your home life, you must have your priorities in place.  You can give attention to both your job and your kids, without neglecting either.

Lori K. Long, Ph.D.

The Parent’s Guide to Family Friendly Work (Career Press, 2007)

http://www.familyfriendlywork.net